Wednesday, December 10, 2014

His love and grace compels me


Every time my eldest son sends me an email he ends with three words: LOVE YOU MOM. He types them in capital letters while everything else remains as you would expect. He makes it stand out. Oh, how they do stand out. I love those three words. With him on the other end of the world in enemy territory they are even more meaningful to me.

On Sunday morning I woke to an email from him. He stated they went a few days without Internet due their ship’s support of a particular mission.

Words I am not fond of are “in support of a mission.”

My son remains on his ship when these “missions” take place but his use of the word serves as a reality check of where he is and what and who he stands ready to protect and defend: America. You. Me.


The knowledge leaves me speechless. If I pause too long in these thoughts it brings me to tears. It’s different to experience a deployment as a mother verses as a wife. But the same promises God spoke to me during my husband’s deployment are the same ones God speaks to me now.

“So do not fear, for I am with you;
    do not be dismayed, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you and help you;
    I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”
Isaiah 41:10

Fear diminishes with the knowledge that the same God here with me also watches over my son.

My son does not know Jesus. At least not the way Jesus wants him to know Him. The more I pursue Christ and allow Him to transform me, the more Christ will be seen in me. If I continue to seek Him and live a life which reflects Him, I believe my son will come to know Him through me.


This compels me.
No, wait. God’s love and grace compels me.

It compels me to seek Him first and to seek Him often.
It compels me to pray for both of our children without ceasing.
It compels me to never let go of hope.

If not through me, God will use another. God knows the desire of my heart (Psalm 37:4).

How can I be sure our children will come to know Him?



He wants us all to know Him.

So I can approach Him confidently knowing what I ask for pleases Him. And I know He hears my prayers. (1 John 5:14).

I believe.
I trust.
I hold on to hope.

I seek Him with all my heart. Before God can use me, He must first have my heart, my whole heart.

“You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.” Jeremiah 29:13

As I grow in knowledge and wisdom of who He is and reflect on all He has done for me, it compels me to obey his commands. Not because I am under the law but because His grace compels me.

When His word tells me I am to have no other god’s before Him and I realize I still have this one god, this love idol, I am compelled to let go. I have held on to this love idol for far too long. My worth is not found in the number on a scale. God, the one and only God, wants so much more for me and for you too.

 “But I lavish unfailing love for a thousand generations on those who love me and obey my commands.” Exodus 20:6

I choose Him and His unfailing love.

I will throw off anything that hinders my relationship with Him (Hebrews 12:1) and I will give Him my whole heart. I pray for Him to continue to change me so I may reflect His glory, just as He intends, to lead others – especially my children – to Him.

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25 comments :

  1. Thanks for sharing this. I know it's straight from your heart, sweet friend. Those boys of yours are blessed to have you. xoxo

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    1. Thank you, sweet friend. Love you much. xoxo

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  2. I first want to say how much I appreciate the sacrifices your family has made to serve us all. Beth, I prayed for your son before beginning to comment. So grateful our God's hand is not to short & is mighty to save. Bless you for sharing with such transparency. May our God draw your son to Himself. Much love & a hug to you!

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    1. Thank you for your prayers, Joanne. They are felt and appreciated. Much love. xoxo

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  3. So happy I was able to stop by this morning. My mom and I were just talking yesterday about our hope and prayers for my dad who, as you mentioned with your son, doesn't know Jesus in the sense that you wish we would - so today's post was especially touching. (I also want to agree with the previous commenter: My family and I really appreciate the sacrifices that you and your family have made to protect us.) Wishing you all the best! xo ♥

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    1. Oh my goodness. I never got back to you. :( I am so sorry. It's good to see you here, Jessica. I really need to catch up. I am so sorry for my lack of responding to you. It's been a busy, but good, few months of reconnecting with my husband. I will be by to visit you soon.
      Blessings. xoxo

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  4. I stand believing, with you, sister. xo I have two sons, just like yours.

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    1. Thank you, Susan. Believing for your two sons as well. Blessings. xoxo

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  5. Hi Beth! I would love my son to come back to the Lord too, I understand you desires for your son. And I am very thankful for his service to our country, and as you said, to you and me. What a joy to hear from him! And if he knows he loves you, then the love of God is in him.
    Trust is a tough thing sometimes. I pray that I will learn to trust that God will watch over our sons, and love them to pieces too :)
    Blessings!
    Ceil

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    1. Praying for God to watch over both of our sons, Ceil, and to draw them closer to Him. I know He does love them to pieces. Much love to you. xoxo

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  6. "If I pause too long in these thoughts it brings me to tears." Perfectly expressed, Beth. The sacrifice your family has made for me, the sacrifice of obedience you make in sharing from your heart - the blessings these things have been in my life - there are no words. Thank you. Praying for you, and for your son. <3 U

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    1. You, my friend, are such a blessing to me. THANK YOU! Praying for you and your family.
      Much love. xoxo

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  7. I am believing and praying with you, Beth. Jesus will, indeed, be close to your son and is ready to open the door.
    Caring through Christ, ~ linda

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    1. Thank you, Linda. I thought of you today as Wreaths Across America remembrance day approaches. We are going to a local cemetery on Saturday to help place wreaths. You will be in our thoughts. Much love. xoxo

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  8. Your Mama heart envelopes us all with your words. Oh how much more our Father loves your son. I join you in praying that he will come to know it clearly and trust Him fully.

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    1. Thank you for your kind words and prayers, Beth. Much love. xoxo

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  9. I so love your tender mama heart, Beth. Joining with you in prayer even as we speak. May your son continue to see Jesus in his parents' love for him and for each other ...

    Hugs.

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    1. Thank you for your prayers, Linda. They are appreciated and felt. Hugs to you. I look forward to connecting soon. Much love. xoxo

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  10. You shared such love in this post-for your sons and for God! I loved the lines-The more I pursue Christ and allow Him to transform me, the more Christ will be seen in me. If I continue to seek Him and live a life which reflects Him, I believe my son will come to know Him through me. I believe that to be true and the best you can give your son is to keep being that model for him. Thank you for these words. Blessings and hugs!

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    1. Thank you for your encouragement, Mary. May we all seek Him with all our heart and may His glory be seen through us. Much love. xoxo

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    2. I love that you joined over at The Weekend Brew. Your encouragement is so real and heartfelt and means the world to me.

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  11. Beth,
    I read your post with tears in my eyes...oh how I pray that both of our sons would come to know Jesus through us...and if not through us, then let us be a giant directional arrow pointing in Jesus' direction. Thank you for the encouragement that I needed today!! Love your heart, girl!!
    Love and ((hugs)),
    Bev

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  12. I just love that it's his grace and love that compel us. That is something worth spending much time thinking about and acting on. Praying for your son's safety---and thanking both him and you, Beth, for your sacrifice for our peace.

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  13. Beth,
    Your heart for your boys is beautiful and I prayed for them as I read your love and faith-filled words. Many blessings to you and your family. Thank you so much. And thank you to your son.

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  14. You trust his unfailing love. Praying for your Mom heart.

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