I never intended on writing a Part 2, but I've felt suspended on those words, "Go and Do the Right Thing." Because what is the right thing?
On my day of weeping, the next right thing for me to do was to write. For me, writing always seems like the right thing to do. Even if I doubt my talent as a writer, it still feels like the right thing. God speaks to me as I write, and peace is always restored to my soul. But on that day of weeping... there was something I chose to do first that allowed my words to unfold the way they did.
I sat on my bed with a blank computer screen staring at me while I tried to form the words to describe the sorrow I felt. Eventually, God pulled me off the bed, and before fully knowing what had transpired, I was dressed and walking out the front door with my camera in hand. This was almost comical. My weeping began because I didn't feel good enough—good enough at anything. And now here I was holding my camera. Prior to taking up writing I had my hopes set on being a photographer, but soon decided this was not a gift God had blessed me with.
As I walked the paths of our forest preserve with my camera in hand, I felt His presence. As the sorrow I felt lifted, my eyes became focused on the path before me and I saw Jesus walking in front of me. Suddenly, something magical began to happen with that camera of mine.
It was a beautiful hour. K-Love played on my phone, and as I walked with Him through the forests our Father created, a familiar song came on.
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The fullness of Your grace is here with meThe richness of Your beauty's all I see
The brightness of Your glory has arrived
In Your presence God, I'm completely satisfied
For You I sing I dance
Rejoice in this divine romance
Lift my heart and my hands
To show my love, to show my love
A deep deep flood, an Ocean flows from You
Of deep deep love, yeah it's filling up the room
Your innocent blood, has washed my guilty life
In Your presence God I'm completely satisfied
Divine Romance, by Phil Wickham
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The right thing for me to do that day was to walk with Jesus. And when I returned home He gave me the words to share with you my sorrow, and in the end I could share how He restored my soul. But now I know those words, Go and Do the Right Thing, are so much more than the words I share on this space with you.
What is the right thing to do?
You're here to be light, bringing out the God-colors in the world. God is not a secret to be kept. We're going public with this, as public as a city on a hill. If I make you light-bearers, you don't think I'm going to hide you under a bucket, do you? I'm putting you on a light stand. Now that I've put you there on a hilltop, on a light stand-shine! Keep open house: be generous with your lives. By opening up to others you'll prompt people to open up with God, this generous Father in heaven. - Matthew 5:14-16 (MSG)
Outside of this blogging world, I tend to hold tightly to God as if He belonged only to me. I keep myself sheltered from real life while God is at work in me restoring my broken heart.. But God made us to be light-bearers. "Blessed are the peacemakers (Matthew 5:9)."
We share honestly our feelings, failures or fears.
We share how He is our hope.
We share how we are learning to depend on His love and Word.
We help lead others to God.
We glorify God.
Bring His message of peace by sharing with others the same peace He is giving you. Let's go and do the right thing and be messengers of His peace.
Will you join me?
Beautiful as always Beth. You have talent with the camera as well. I pray your sorrow is fading. God Bless, friend.
ReplyDeleteAbsolutely beautiful, both parts 1 and 2. I think these are things all artists struggle, with, especially in the tension of learning to glorify God through our work. Am I good enough? Is this what God wants me to do? Am I being self-serving or God-serving? Am I bold enough when I write about my faith? Obnoxious and driving others away? These are questions I struggle through regularly.
ReplyDeleteI, too, wanted to become a photographer. When I realized that in spite of my fancy camera (a gift), this isn't the time of life to focus on that, it was kind of freeing to let it go. To move on to, as you said, the "right thing." Our days are mostly made up of the mundane and sometimes it doesn't feel very impactful, for me anyway. I remind myself that obedience is my job and the results are up to God...
Don't know if that makes a lick of sense...I was really blessed by your posts today...You're an excellent writer!
Thank you, Stephanie. Every word you wrote made sense! I appreciate you sharing. It's comforting to know I'm not alone in the questions I find myself asking as I write. But He keeps returning me to writing.
DeleteThank you so much for sharing. Your words touched me very deeply because I feel the same way. I totally identified with your insecurities as a writer and as a photographer : ) The two things I've always been drawn to, but never felt good enough as. Thank you for stopping by my blog too. Blessings to you always
ReplyDeleteThank you, Gisela. I appreciate you stopping by and sharing. Blessings to you!
DeleteYes!! I will walk with you -- sharing His light through however He sees fit. So grateful that you published this, filled with courage and grace.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Jen. Thank you for your kind words and for your heart to allow us to share with each other through your blog.
DeleteYour pictures are beautiful and so is your writing. I need to be more open too about God with people in my real life and not just in the blogging world. Joining you as we let our lights shine brightly to those around us
ReplyDeleteThank you, Alecia, for stopping by and sharing.
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