{More} Things I'm Discovering

These things I’m discovering appear to be the easier posts to write. The many other things I want to tell you about – like the wonder and miracles He performs that truly cannot be counted – remain a process of moving thoughts from my head to paper. What I want to express seems to get lost in translation.

Source: Scripture Pictures

If we were to spend any time together face-to-face, you would find me apologizing often for my inability to express myself clearly… convinced what comes out are merely jumbled up thoughts.

You might tell me I’m doing just fine. I would thank you for being kind, and patient.

There really is much I want to tell you. It will come.

Until such time, it’s apparently a season of discovery so why not continue to share the discoveries with you? Okay? I shall make the assumption you're responding with an okay back to me. ☺

When invited to someone’s home, bring the hostess chocolates (one suggestion) instead of cut flowers. If you have your hearts set on cut flowers, come with a vase and arrange the flowers for your sweet hostess upon your arrival. I support this suggestion knowing if you were to show up at my home with cut flowers it would immediately throw off my “best hostess ever” intentions. While I’m sure your cut flowers would be beautiful, instead of me focused on greeting you as my honored guest I am instead frantically looking for the vase I know I do not own or went into hiding. Point being, lets be mindful of unnecessarily unraveling our sweet hostesses. I totally get not wanting to show up empty handed which is why I appreciated this wisdom.

True humility also includes not thinking less of yourself. My discovery… I need to work on my humbleness. Lord, make me humble.

Jesus commands us to "go into all the world and preach the gospel to all creation (Mark 16:15).” And in Romans 1:16 we learn from Paul that we should not be ashamed of the gospel, “because it is the power of God that brings salvation to everyone who believes.” This isn’t new knowledge, but an awakening in my heart to be obedient to all He commands and a prayer to be more bold and unashamed to share the best news EVER! Lord, please make this especially so with my children.

Speaking of prayer, I have come to realize I need to not only read about living more of a praying life, I need to get on with the business of praying. Like the on my hands and knees kind of praying. Not only is PRAYER my One Word for 2018, but as Priscilla Shirer writes in her book Fervant, “Prayer is the portal that brings the power of heaven down to earth. It is kryptonite to the enemy and to all his ploys against you” and the people you love. Lord, make me a prayer warrior.

Speaking of obedience, this may need to be my new life verse – “love the LORD your God, listen to his voice, and hold fast to him. For the LORD is your life (Deuteronomy 30:20).” In summary: love, obey and commit for He is our life. Lord, may I walk in a manner that reflects your reign in my life.

My heart’s desire is for deeper connection with woman but while this is my heart’s desire there can be circumstances when it’s so hard. I attended a party recently where there were brief signs of connection but I left knowing I gave Satan the upper hand (again) and let him steal my opportunity for joy. Lord, may I no longer let comparison be the thief of my joy. Like really, it needs to stop.

Speaking of connection, the lovely Shauna Niequist reminded me of the importance of having a friend who is brave enough to say something difficult to help bring you to the next level of growth. “Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses (Proverbs 27:6).” We need to tell each other the truth so we can get better. It may hurt but may we have a friend who can be trusted. Lord, thank you for my dear friend, Susan. She speaks truth even when it hurts but she has proven to be a safe place--someone I can trust. And, Lord, make me a safe place for another. Help me point them to You.

For fun… Everyone must have a globe (or many globes) in their home! ❤ I’m discovering most people do. Do you? I’m on the hunt for an antique globe for my oldest son and his wife for their new home.

We will end on that fun note. Truthfully though… go get yourself a globe if you don’t have one. It’s more fun to antique shop for one versus heading out to Hobby Lobby (mind you, their globes are cute and I would totally get wanting to walk out with one).


Thank you for gathering here with me, friend.

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Things I'm Discovering {The Harder Things}

In my last post (read here) I shared with you the lighter side of the things I am discovering. Shall we move on to the harder things? What if we kick off with three more lighter things and then share two harder things? Can you tell I'm stalling on sharing the harder things?

The Lighter Things

Hospitality love - I love to extend invitations to family and friends to join me at my table. The unfortunate side of this is my inability to cook for said people. While I am sure a meal isn't a must for hosting, there is a dose of happiness which comes in serving others a meal. I have discovered if I keep it simple, I can scrounge up a decent meal. To date, I have made Sloppy Joe's for neighbors (it was literally the first time I delivered food to someone), an extra-large portion of Sloppy Joe's for our small group, a Pork Roast for my parents, and Turkey Taco Bowls for a church friend. Oh wait, I served up a baked potato bar for our small group once too (that didn't go well... who messes up potatoes???) Progress.

The lost art of a handwritten note love  - I love sending them and I am oh so excited and blessed when I receive one. May this not be lost art anymore.

Turquoise love - It has become my most favorite color. It started with hubs giving me my wished for turquoise picnic table and has now become one of the accent colors in our newly renovated home. By the way, our turquoise table was in the news. You can read the article here. And read about the #FrontYardPeople movement here.

The Harder (darker) Things

Fear is a Liar - This truth is being made more clear to me. Even more so is the truth of who is behind the fear and the lies; Satan. He is the father of lies (John 8:44).

Since listening to Episode 2 of Emily Freeman’s podcast, I have been asking the question she says to ask before every hard decision (Is your decision being led by love or by fear?) even in the simpler day-to-day decisions because I know even in them I allow fear to take the lead.

In those simpler decisions, like pressing send on a text to invite a friend to coffee, I first lean toward devaluing who I am by highlighting my weaknesses and viewing myself as less-than. Armed with truth and a fresh perspective of who is behind the fear and the lies, I have come to see how frequent I allow Satan to lead in the simple and hard decisions versus God. How do I not let God (love) lead? His plans for me are for good and not to harm (Jeremiah 29:11); Satan’s plans not so much.

As Zach Williams sings in this song, “Fear, he is a liar. He will take your breath. Stop you in your steps. Fear is a liar. He will rob your rest and steal your happiness.”

But God: “By this I know that You delight in me: my enemy does not shout in triumph over me.” Psalm 41:11

That verse, friends... may we write this truth deep within our hearts. Christ has shouted victory over us.

Envy/Jealousy - On a not so long ago Sunday I had a full blown ugly cry episode with my husband via FaceTime.

A little background... One of the perks of him being stationed in Germany is the opportunity to travel Europe. On this particular Sunday he was in Poland. He had already been to Frankfurt, Germany and Amsterdam, Netherlands. With each trip my envy increased. I was the one who always wanted to travel outside of the US. I wanted what he had. I wanted to experience what he was experiencing with him. The underlying truth being I was jealous that the Army had him instead of me.

In this ugly cry episode with my husband, I was focused on my own selfish desires and with that saying, “I am not satisfied with your plan, God.” And this was causing strife in my marriage.

It just so happened that shortly after the ugly cry episode I landed on the verse Psalm 21:19: “It is better to dwell in the wilderness, than with a contentious and an angry woman.” Ouch

But God: “Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.” Hebrews 4:16

God brought me exactly where I needed to be, on my knees, in prayer, at His throne of Grace asking for mercy. And mercy is exactly what I received.

Envy and jealousy remains a struggle (not only in the matter with my husband) but I see God’s grace in bringing the sin to light so that He can set me free from it.

I had intentions of telling you what I’ve discovered about right thinking versus wrong thinking (Romans 12:3-8) but this post has reached my word count limit so we shall save the topic for another time.

As Emily Freeman ends most of her posts, "may grace surprise you kindly today."

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Things I'm Discovering

Hello, sweet friends. It's me again. Waving hello.👋

My go-to conversation starter question when our small group meets is to begin with asking, "What was the highlight of your week?" My hope in asking this question is that everyone will have something to share. Because regardless of the hard circumstances we may be in the midst of, I pray we still see the providential hand of God in our lives... may we still be able to count His graces.

Source: Scripture Pictures

My response to the question (when we met last night) just so happened to be writing again. I praise God for a passion which remains and just maybe the time away from this space was needed to "fan into flame" this gift from God. The fire had never gone out; it only needed to be fed.

Does that make sense? Ya know, I always doubt that I make any sense. Deep sigh.

***

I thought I would take a few minutes (or more) to share a few things I'm discovering. Note... don't be expecting any big revelations... just some light-hearted discoveries. I'm easing my way back into this writing thing.

Here goes.

Podcast love - I had not previously taken the plunge into the podcast world but recently decided to give them a try. Emily Freeman's podcast, "The Next Right Thing," was at the top of my list. Several of you confirmed I made a wise choice. Thank you!! I have discovered two others I love. Here's the thing though, the most ideal way to listen to an episode would be in my car while on the way to work. But... I had a car accident with a steel pole (yes, just me and a steel pole, in my church parking lot, after a prayer meeting) which has the needed function to listen to podcasts not working. Annoying!! I must figure this out.

(Check out The Turquoise Table Podcast with Kristin Schell and The Simple Show with Tsh Oxenreider.)

Tattoo love - People have their opinions on getting tattoos. Is it biblically right or wrong to get one? I'm not expecting you to answer that, by the way. Regardless, I now have a tattoo on my wrist which simply says, "But God." I love all that led to getting this tattoo and everything about when and how it took place, and who I shared the experience with.

Wine and Netflix love - Friends, the evenings are oh so lonely at times without my husband. One glass of wine while watching the Netflix series "Jane the Virgin" makes those lonely evenings more bearable. Seriously, this show is quite entertaining and cute. It holds no comparison to "This is Us," mind you.

Family and Friends love - That glass of wine and Jane are often not needed because I have the bestest family and friends. Most evening and weekends I have plans to gather with either one friend or a few, and have recently had the chance to gather with a few family members too. This is truly the desire of my heart... rich and meaningful connections. Let's gather at a table, friends. Pretty please!!

Dove Dark Chocolate love - A chocolate a day brings me one day closer to my husband being in my arms again. Forget the chocolate kisses many use for count downs... I went directly to the good stuff! Yum!!

Dog love - I need God to cultivate within me a deeper love for my dog. Until such time, my dog is driving me crazy! I feel for him. I really do. He misses the man of the house lots and lots. But his missing has resulted in him whining All. The. Time. Lord, help me, please.

Travel blogs love - Why did I think these did not exists? Thank you, travel bloggers, for your wisdom on how best to tackle Prague and Vienna in a few days (future trip with hubs). Thank you awesome travel blogger person for not allowing me to visit Vienna without knowledge of the museum there dedicated to globes. If I discovered this after the fact I would have been heartbroken. Globe love!!!

Grandma love - I may not "officially" be a grandma yet but I know being one will be the best thing EVER! Oh goodness gracious... all the love!!!

I think the next post shall be the harder things I'm discovering... like the things Satan attempts to condemn me for BUT GOD in His grace gently convicts me instead. For example, I have a real issue with jealousy and comparison. Oh, it's ugly and it must stop.

More to come another day. Until then...as we move into this Easter week, may we set our eyes on Jesus and be mindful of His amazing gift.

“I am the resurrection and the life. 

The one who believes in me will live, even though they die."

- John 11:25

What I've Learned {in April}

1. Hubs and I have bought into many myths pertaining to debt. We are being challenged in a convicting and positive way through a David Ramsey “Financial Peace” course offered through our church.

God’s Word: “Keep your life free from love of money, and be content with what you have, for he has said, ‘I will never leave you nor forsake you.’” Hebrews 13:5

2. God has much to say on being a good steward of money.

God’s Word: “One who is faithful in a very little is also faithful in much.” Luke 16:10

3. Taking the “Financial Peace” course means creating a monthly budget. Creating a monthly budget means allocating how and where you spend your income. Allocating how and where you spend your money means you come to the conclusion you don’t need to spend money on a maid. I surely did learn in April how much I miss my maid. She did a great job with the deep cleaning. I am slowly learning to enjoy again a daily routine of tending to our home.

God’s Word: Proverbs 31

4. I love that we are a part of the Army Reserves family. They do a fabulous job of taking care of their soldiers and their families.

God’s Word: “Let each of you look not only to his own interest, but also to the interest of others.” Philippians 2:4

5. Twenty-five years of marriage does not mean we have this marriage thing all figured out. Hubs and I are thankful for the chaplain-led program, Strong Bonds, offered through the Army. We enjoyed two days in Minneapolis last weekend focused on strengthening our marriage and connecting with other military couples.

God’s Word: “Let marriage be held in honor among all.” Hebrews 13:4

6. When you get to Deuteronomy 34 after seven months of studying The Life of Moses tears will fall over the death of Moses and him only seeing the Promised Land from a distance. Even though Moses asked God to let him cross over to see the wonderful land (Deuteronomy 3:25), I imagine Moses was far more excited about his heavenly home with God.

God’s Word: “No eye has ever seen or no ear has ever heard or no mind has ever thought of the wonderful things God has made ready for those who love Him.” 1 Corinthians 2:9

7. I already know I am going to miss my Monday evenings with Bible Study Fellowship (BSF). My prayer is that the habits I have formed as a result of BSF stay with me throughout the summer months instead of waiting to take them back up again come September when we study Revelation. Time with God and in His Word should not be a seasonal thing but a daily thing.

God’s Word: Jesus answered, “It is written: ‘Man shall not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God.’” Matthew 4:4

8. An extra day or two was probably needed to ponder vow renewal plans before I pressed send on our Save the Date email. Once the email was out I had a panic attack over the number of people we had invited to our home. All is good though because God is good! We are likely making alternate plans to have our celebration elsewhere and thankfully our first choice for a venue is still available. It’s a good thing Save the Date’s don’t include details on the location.

God's Word:  “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.” Philippians 4:6

9. Watching your children go through hard seasons is one of the most difficult things we do as parents. But God doesn't waste our suffering. Our family of four is growing closer as we walk through the hard stuff together.

God’s Word: “Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.” Romans 5:3-5

10. My new favorite game is TableTopics. Our family stays in frequent communication these days via group text messaging thanks to this lovely game. I’m in charge of asking the question and then the men join in with their answers. I have 135 questions to choose from. Oh, what fun!

God’s Word: “A happy heart makes the face cheerful but heartache crushes the spirit.” Proverbs 15:13

How about you? What did God teach you in April?

What I've Learned {first quarter 2015}

1) Life surely has its seasons. I am discovering how true this is with writing and I am learning to be okay with now not being a season for writing. Now is a season for other special things.

God’s Word: “There is a special time for everything. There is a time for everything that happens under heaven.” Ecclesiastes 3:1

2) Things don’t always go as I plan but I can always trust in God’s plans. The same holds true for trusting in God’s plans for my children.

God’s Word: “For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” Jeremiah 29:11

3) I won’t always understand His ways but His ways are always best.

God’s Word: “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the Lord. “As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.” Isaiah 55:8-9

4) Being a parent never ends. However, when you are a parent to adult children there are fewer opportunities to voice your thoughts, suggestions and opinions. But we can take our concerns to the Lord. “And the greatest thing about that is, when we take our concerns to the Lord – trusting that God hears our prayers and answers them on behalf of our adult children – it means our prayers have power to affect change in their lives.” ~ Stormie Omartian, The Power of Praying for Your Adult Children (pg. 9)

God’s Word: “All your children shall be taught by the Lord, and great shall be the peace of your children.” Isaiah 54:13

5) “Yahweh gives courage; I can be unwavering in my obedience” @steveryancarter. It’s not about my strengths but about how God wants to work in and through me as I trust in Him. It’s not about me; it’s all about Him.

God’s Word: “If anyone serves, they should do so with the strength God provides, so that in all things God may be praised through Jesus Christ. To him be the glory and the power for ever and ever. Amen.” 1 Peter 4:11

6) The mission of the Institute for Faith, Work & Economics to “inspire Christians to live out a Biblical theology that integrates faith, work and economics” is having a positive impact in my daily life as I try to integrate my faith and my work. I am grateful to The High Calling for leading me to this website.

God’s Word: “For we are God's handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.” Ephesians 2:10

7) People want to be seen and known. We can start by knowing their name. It’s a good first step in loving our neighbors. And we all know our neighbor isn't just the person living next door to us. I have been at my place of employment for over five (5) years now and of the 80+ people employed with me there are many I still do not know. So I am starting with getting to know their names.

God’s Word: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’ The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no commandment greater than these.” Mark 12:30-31

8) I need God ALL. THE. TIME. Knowing my need for Him is not new but I am learning how to find a rhythm of stopping to be with God throughout my day because of my constant need for Him. Thankfully, God promises to be with us ALL. THE. TIME.

God’s Word: “Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” Isaiah 41:10

9) When God asks me to do again the thing I fear most, I remember His faithfulness in bringing me this far and trust Him with the un-known future for He has proven Himself faithful.

God’s Word: “Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for he who promised is faithful.” Hebrews 10:23

10) Planning a wedding – a renewal of vows – brings much joy to my heart! We (hubs and I) have plans to celebrate 25 years together this fall with a big celebration!

God’s Word: “Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.” Mark 10:9

How about you, friends? What has God been teaching you?

What I Learned About Grace in May

Instead of my typical Friday Randomness post, I am joining Emily Freeman of Chatting at the Sky again for her end of the month post where she invites other writers to come along and share what they learned the past month.

I learned many wonderful things throughout the month of May, such as:

  1) I love to paint (with a glass of wine in hand, of course)
  2) Speaking in front of my church becomes easier with practice
  3) To-do lists work
  4) Hiring a lawn service was a very wise decision
  5) I am addicted PicMonkey (pay for the full version . . . it’s worth it)
  6) Meeting writing friends in real life will never get old (I met three in May)
  7) Rearranging furniture can really open up a room
  8) The Life Application Study Bible is a wonderful study tool
  9) Encouraging one another makes my heart sing
10) I am beyond ready for my husband to come home

But as I made my list, God spoke to me on the word “Grace.”

My last post from the love dare series spoke to how love is not irritable. Two reasons for being irritable are stress and selfishness. My eyes have been opened recently to the expectations I place on myself which lead to stress, which leads to being irritable. When I look at my expectations it has much to do with selfishness. The writers of The Love Dare book are rather wise I'm discovering.

Through my discoveries, God taught me a thing or two (or eight) in May on choosing to give myself grace.

1) Grace to know it’s okay if I do not meet my goal of reading through the Bible this year. He cares more about my desire to know Him better and spend time with Him. He loves how my mornings currently begin with the Seeds of Spring reading plan through YouVersion, time in a devotional, or searching out verses speaking to me through my love dare series to better understand God’s kind of love. My goal to read through the Bible is just that: my goal and not necessarily His.

2) Grace to know it’s okay if I do not write out His graces every day in my gratitude journal. It’s even okay if I go several weeks without writing them down. He knows my heart. He knows not a day goes by when I'm not grateful for who He is and for how He has transformed this heart of mine. Gratitude can be shown in many more ways than through a list.

3) Grace to know it’s okay if I am not a perfect wife, mom, daughter, sister or friend. Perfection will never be found this side of heaven. He cares about my willingness to allow His light to shine through the cracks as He refines me to become more and more like Him.

4) Grace to know it’s okay if I am sad over the decline in readers of my blog as long as I do let the numbers define my worth. My worth has already been found in Him. He cares about my willingness to obey the call to write and He will bless me for my yes. I need to trust Him with who does or does not read the words He places on my heart to share.

5) Grace to remember He never asked me to be superwoman. I cannot be all things to everyone. I need to first and foremost be His.

6) Grace to know He doesn’t call the equipped; he equips those He calls. He will give me everything I need to encourage a group of military wives these next six weeks through the (in)couragers community groups. While I do not experience all the same challenges as a spouse of a reservist, He cares most about my heart to encourage them.

7) Grace to remember “He is always good and I am always loved” (Ann Voskamp).

8) I choose to give myself grace because His grace is enough and in admitting my weaknesses, I affirm God's strength (2 Corinthians 12:9).

“For from His fullness we have all received, grace upon grace” ~ John 1:16

Wishing you grace upon grace.

10 Things I Learned in April

I enjoy my weekly Friday Randomness post because I can randomly decide to change things up. And today I choose to join Emily Freeman of Chatting at the Sky for her end of the month post where she invites other writers to come along and share what they learned the past month.

Original photo by friend Judd Johnson

1. A trip to San Diego to see my oldest son and his wife was precisely what I needed to refresh my heart as I approached the half-way point of my husband's deployment. I loved meeting their sweet new puppy too. I’m ready for grandchildren but will gladly cuddle up with Storm for now.

2. I enjoy shopping so much more at recycled designer apparel stores. I fell in love with My Sister's Closet while in San Diego. Who doesn't love walking out of a store with a few outfits, a cute purse and a pair of sexy shoes for under fifty dollars? The added bonus was shopping with these two lovely ladies:

My daughter-in-law on the left and writing friend Satin of My Heart, His Words on the right.

3. My son and his wife agreeing to join me for church makes my heart sing with joy. Oodles of joy!

4. My youngest son wins the hearts of his audience with the first strum of his classical guitar. He had his first guitar gig at an adorable Rock House/Coffee House/Wine Bar mid-April and I must say I have a very talented son. A live performance picture can be found here.

5. Winter does eventually come to an end. I survived our horribly long and cold one without a complete meltdown. PRAISE GOD! It’s still colder than I would prefer it to be for this time of the year but we are headed in the right direction. It’s warm enough for evening walks again which has a positive impact on my attitude.

6. I’m addicted to buying books (I shared addiction here) and April is apparently the time of the year for book launches. I really need to find more time to read. If you have not read Jennifer Dukes Lee’s new book Love Idol, head on over to Amazon and buy now. If you have an addiction like me and you are trying to refrain from buying another book, buy this one first. While you are at it, buy Spiritual Misfit by Michelle DeRusha too. The two are meant to be purchased as a pair.

7. God gives you grace just when you need it most. You can read here how He used friends to bless me when missing my husband desperately. We truly were not made to do life alone.

8. Deciding to read and blog my way through the Love Dare book during my husband’s deployment has taken my attention off of my strongholds and instead put my focus on chasing after God’s kind of love. As a result, those strongholds are beginning to lose their grip. My Lenten journey may not have ended as intended but God is good and He will give me victory over this mountain.

“For the Lord your God is going with you! He will fight for you against your enemies, and he will give you victory!” ~ Deuteronomy 20:4

9. Saying yes to attending an (in)RL meet-up was a wise decision. Saying yes to God is always a wise decision. If God calls you to something, He will surely see you through it and bless you for your yes. This is exactly what God did for me. A big heart-felt thank you to my new friend Kay for her heart to host the meet-up at her church.

10. I love exploring options for a blog makeover. However, making a decision on the direction to take is hard. VERY HARD. I've learned to say thank you to my blog designer often so she does not lose patience with me. Creating a Pinterest board to explore options has also proven to be excellent advice received from a writing friend. Oh, you can follow me in Pinterest here if you would like. I’d love to follow you too.

And one more (so I guess that makes it Eleven Things Learned in April) because the month of April is over which means I am one month closer to having this gorgeous husband of mine back home.

Since this is what I normally do on Friday's, below are a few of my favorite blog reads from the past week:

• Shelly of Redemptions Beauty: On Trusting Our Work to God: A Guest Post by Anita Mathias 

• M. Molly Backes @Medium: How to Be a Writer

• Diane Bailey: Worst Typo Ever - Telling Your Story

• Susan Stilwell's Guest Post at Inspire a Fire: What A Pair of Ugg Boots Taught Me About Prayer 

• Tammy Hendricksmyer's Guest Post at The Gift of Writing: How Writing Found My Inner Child

There are always many more posts that moved me. It's so hard to choose just a few. Thank you for sharing your stories, friends. They do matter.

Blessings upon blessings.